The Wild Wild Wests

Hayyyy! What's up my peeps!  I know, I know I have left you hanging. RUDE!   We are home again.  We were admitted for exactly 24 hours and discharged the very next afternoon. Paxton is walking, in fact he walked the tunnel from clinic to hospital just minutes after his doctor decided to admit him~ naturally~murphys law.  I am unsure about the "fluid returning to his lungs" diagnosis at this point because they did absolutely nothing to him cardiac wise in the 24 hours we were there and "miraculously" it was gone by the next day to be discharged.  While beyond grateful we are home, I am admittedly concerned that this is twice now we have been told he needs a cath only to have them retract with no explanation.  We will be getting a second opinion on Wednesday and I am incredibly curious to see what this doctor has to say.  I don't want Pax to go through anything more, but I also don't want an emergent event happening because this has not been dealt with ...

Oh hell yah!!!! *************************** We broke out peeps!!! I type this to you from my very own bed!!! We were discharged last evening. We didn't tell Daddy and walked into the house around 7:30 without him ever knowing. He was beyond surprised!  So surprised in fact, that he was chillin in his "man pants"  when we walked in so no pictures are able to posted of the Daddy/Pax reunion. ; D The older two boys were already down for the night which was good because it allowed us to get Pax acclimated. We gave him a shower/bath to keep his incision from being submerged, yet allowed us to wash all of that hospital off of him so much better than the brotha baths he got for two weeks. He stumbled around like a drunken soldier (he is still sooo weak) from room to room checking everything out and playing with his toys.  I hovered like the helicopter mom I so am not. I put him to sleep in his very own bed...

It's a stream of consciousness kind of night because I am not going to lie, today was tough.  Pax and I got roughly two hours sleep last night and that compiled with the lack of sleep in the last week altogether sort of sent us both over the edge today. There came a point where my head was so foggy I thought for sure I was getting the flu. That has since passed, thank God, but it never ceases to amaze me how the body begins to shut down when it hasn't had enough rest.  I kept reminding myself over and over how much worse it could be and I let myself cry when I needed to.  I missed field trips and baseball games today. I am homesick for my boys and it hurts my heart. I have these amazing people stepping in to do these wonderful things with my babes, but I am sad and jealous that I cannot be there.  That is the truth and I think any mother would agree that you can be grateful and jealous all at the same time. Half of my heart is here and the other half is 2 hours away ...

I haven't written because I haven't been able to because I have this amazing little boy who is doing so awesome and needs his Mommy every minute of the day. ********************** I am all and by all I mean,  ALL,  he wants. Which is the most, and by most, I mean,  MOST ,   wonderful feeling there is in the entire freaking world!  He has called out my name approximately 3,678 times since he has come out of anesthesia and it is music to my ears, absolutely the most beautiful sound ever. I am not sure everyone around us thinks so, but oh' is it ever. the fist time i got to hold my boy post op ******************** Paxton's surgery could not have gone any better. He has now rocked the Norwood, The Glenn and The Fontan.  All 3 are behind us. History.  He did it!   I remember sitting at the table 31 weeks pregnant watching the doctor draw diagr...

While this may sound redundant I have to say I still spend a lot of time each day reveling in the novelty of being home. Spending two entire months in a hospital round the clock really changes you and the things I would have done to be home all that time have yet to escape me. I wonder if they ever will. Course, if they do I will be doing it all over again two more times so I have some reminders lined up. Although, I doubt I will forget. I find I will stop in the moment and realize that I am sitting in my own chair in our beautiful home feeding the baby that was in my belly whom we were unsure would make it more than once.  I find joy in doing all of the little things. I find joy that our family is reunited.  Joy is my word for this holiday season. Keep an eye out for it again coming soon!  Yesterday I spent a good long time going through my emails and facebook in an attempt to get back to so many of those wonderful people who have reached out to me.  I had hundreds upon hundreds of em...