Merry Christmas To All


And To All A Good Night...


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Happy One Month Birthday Baby Boy

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Today our son turns one month old!  There were days when I was still pregnant with him that we were not sure he would be alive to see this day. God, has blessed us. He is here. He is perfect. He is fighting the biggest fight of his life.  Just as sure as the H (home) word was mentioned to us as a possibility in a couple of weeks yesterday, I in turn, got the phone call at 2 a.m. this morning that his heart is struggling.  His heart is working so hard to keep going. It is a delicate balance. One day everything looks picture perfect and hours later it all changes.  I am working on not looking to far down the road, one day at a time, one hour at a time, one prayer at a time. Today our son turns one month old and the alternative makes me realize that I/we can do this. Even though there will be many tears through out this, many angry days, sad ones and joyful ones. I do believe that God has a plan for us and for our son and as we wait to learn what that plan is, I am finding a patience I ha...
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Holding On

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I am sitting here in my room at the Ronald McDonald house that ahem...has no t.v. so instead I am listening to Michael Bubles I Wanna Go Home on Pandora. He says it all when he sings: I feel like I am living someone else's life. It's like I stepped outside. When everything was going right.  I wanna go home. This room is empty and plain and I know many have sat in here before me, feeling all that I am feeling right now. My stuff remains in laundry baskets unpacked only touched to grab an outfit to go see my boy.  I am attempting to pay bills and do all of the "normal" things in life that don't stop when you have a sick baby. It is taking me forever to get through this one thing I need to do, but paying bills seems so unimportant right now and yet life is sadly, all about money and bills. The medical bills have already started pouring in. They sure don't waste any time do they.  It's never ending. What is ending at some point, is this stay here. While I can...
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And he's off

Paxton is out of surgery and recovering. He is heavily sedated as of now, but all went well and doctors are happy with the repair. God is good! Prayers were answered. Today is a damn good, beautiful day. I will update more later. Thank you all for walking this journey beside us ! Update 8:10 am. Just got call they have made the first incision and are working through scar tissue now. He is stable and doing awesome. 7:20 am They have taken Paxton back to the OR. I will update when I know more. Please pray for my boy. ~j
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