The Wild Wild Wests

As if the last year hasn't given me enough to think about. It seems some days my mind never shuts down.  I realize I'm still sort of a mess inside. Paxton slept late today and again I started freaking out.  My husband says to me "what do you think he's gonna like just up and die one day?"  Men, gotta love em'.  I said "sadly that could happen." He's all like don't talk like that blah blah blah and I immediately got jealous over his ability to block it all out.  How can he not go check on his breathing when he sleeps that long. How can he tickle him for so long that he starts to turn blue from holding his breath and not stop.  Granted, he was totally fine, but I am so very scared to put to much stress on his heart. So afraid as he gets bigger and wants to go, to let him.  He wants to crawl and run and be wild like his brothers and when I see him straining to try and crawl, when I hear him panting I have to bite my tongue. I need to let him liv...

Dear Austin, I think back to four years ago at this time and cannot believe how life has changed.  How you changed me.  Simply, you made me a Mom for the first time.  I knew I would love you so deeply, because that's how I love anyway, so my child I knew would go beyond that.  However, my heart was completely unprepared for the magnitude of emotion you would bring.  I remember you as a newborn in my arms, man was I so proud. You came out perfect and wailing, angelic in every way.  Four years later, nothing has changed. You are still perfect and angelic.  You are the most amazing big brother. You are kind and sensitive.  If someone is crying so too are you.  You are just as in love with me as I you.  I can feel it. I can see it.  The way in which you put both hands on my cheeks to kiss me melts me.  You can be angry as all get out and Mama can bring you to your knees instantly simply offering you a hug. This yea...

As luck would have it, we made it safely to and home from the Bahamas.  There were moments of question that this would happen, say when we walked up and saw this.... "It has like...real propellers...."  Yah, the miniature stature of this plane did not set so well with my girl and I, all the while our husbands were tickled pink at the horror on our faces... Needless to say, we executed a very well planned birthday surprise for a dear friend. The trip was much needed of course, somewhat twilight zoney as we ran into a lot of hiccups that merely left us peeing our pants with laughter and sometimes cringing, but nevertheless finding fun with good friends in tow.  It's late and Mama is tired so I will leave you with a sneak peek until I can download the many pics we took.  They will make you snicker, say what the.... and of course smile.   (Blech. Crappy i phone pics and really it appears I could use a nap. I get all tired when I don't have kids to keep me a r...

On a jet plane! And it's gonna be good! See ya'll on the flip side... ~J

Oh, Mason I just don't even know where to begin.  The time, as they all say has gone by far to fast.  I am so in love with you, you don't even know. I can't describe it. Even as a writer, I don't have words for that. You were born wailing with a head full of "chia pet" hair and man if you aren't the most gorgeous little man ever. Your cheeks win over everyone who meet you. Your deep honey eyes are mesmerizing and your little smile melts me at a mere glance. You are as in l.o.v.e with your brother Austin as I am in love with you. It's beyond endearing to see your adoration for him. It makes me all the more grateful for having you just 11 1/2 months after I had him.  You have begun to lose your baby weight.  Your voice is so deep and as as aloof as you were as a wee one you have turned about as mushy and snuggly as they come! I simply have to reach my arms out and a runnin' you shall come! You have many nicknames. The first one was ...

It's amazing how my boys bring people together. They've always been able to do that and as each year passes, I realize this affect they have on people.  So many came to help prepare the best birthday celebration ever for them and let me tell you they were on pins and needles waiting for their "big boy party!" Theme of the year chosen by the birthday boys themselves: John Deere Tractor How does the old saying go... the apple doesn't fall far... Go big or go home right...so all out we went. For these two boys who had one hell of a year to endure, nothing but the best was what they got! Rock climbing (way to represent the best Cross fit gym ever there bro!) Slip Slip Sliding Down The Frog Slide~oh yah! (notice mason next in line. one is never far from the other.) Or splish splashin through the kiddie pool Little boys trying to be big boys Where old friends... And best friends joined in the fun. Where gorgeous miracle babies sat taking it all...